Take a Deetour

"I write to find out what I think." - Joan Didion

Friday, January 20, 2006

The Deetourguide to Bowling

For a gratifying game (assuming your goal is to actually hit something besides your fellow human beings):

1. Stand and aim from the next lane over.
2. Throw ball at the at the centre arrow-shaped lane marking (at no time should there be a graceful swing & release motion).
3. Listen for ensuing thud.
4. Watch ball hurtle toward pins.
5. See (some) pins fall.
6. Allow teammates to make encouraging comments like, "You was robbed, man!"
7. Make Drop it Like It's Hot your official team motto.
8. Always have nifty dance moves handy (if the All Blacks have their Haka, so can you!) - essential for limb-loosening & morale boosting.
9. Adopt said dance moves as occasional shock and awe tactics over rival team. Include shrieks of, "You're allergic to testicles!" for extra incredible results.
10. Beer optional, but recommended.

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